Hello again. I obviously have taken some time away from blogging, but for very good reason. I last wrote the week before I departed on a very impromptu journey to Indonesia. This journey, unlike much of my experiences in Australia, was very unstructured, I was not catered to, and it was all together a bit rough and in some cases more dangerously thrilling. I think the added discomfort that my parents refused to accept my travel plans made it all the more compelling of a destination (sorry mom and dad). I have taken a few weeks since my trip to get back into the swing of things here in Melbourne and reflect on everything slowly. I have a tendency to get over-excited when I first return from a trip and as much as I wanted to capture that enthusiasm in a blog post, I figured I should cool it a bit and see how the experience is retold after truly setting in.
So in the next few posts I will attempt to tell the story of Bali, Indonesia; the ups and downs, near downfalls of friendships, and near catastrophic motorbike endeavors. The friendships I made along the way are both astounding and unexpected. Basically, I found what I was looking for this semester, and it wasn't in Australia. Don't get me wrong, I am extremely blessed and thankful, but just as I am learning, from one of my favorite quotes "God hates control freaks," planning an external trip to have an internal effect is futile. God works in mysterious ways and that is something I truly learned. The purpose of this is that. It's never what we intend and things are always leading to the next domino down the road.
Well right now my controlling nature is getting the best of me and I am truly starting to dread home because of the uncertainty it brings. Where will I work?, who will still be in my life? Will I have lost many dear friendships? Will new ones take me completely by surprise? Will my family be happy to have me back, or ready for me to move on again? Where will I even be living? It's sorta up in the air at present. Maybe I should take my own advice and just let God take me where HeShe wants me to go. I feel renewed. My new spiritual high comes directly from travel that is true, but not all types of travel apparently. Independence and uncertainty and conquering fears seem to factor into it all. Australia has not been a place of real independence or growth, but I have learned a lot and led a privileged existence. I have learned the value of friendship and seen people come from near and far to recreate the magic of friendships that were forged less than a year ago at a camp far, far away. I have learned about immense generosity and met a multitude of lively and happy people. I have been humbled by the world's knowledge on politics, geography and culture. When a random Australian man who learned I am from Tampa Bay, FL comments about how I must be affected by the tragic oil spill in the Gulf, I am a bit taken aback. Would anyone in Tampa Bay, FL be able to comment or wish the same condolences if a similar tragedy occurred off the coast of Melbourne? I don't really think so. So here I am, one week till departure, feeling a bit confused and a bit guilty. Happy about Indonesia, confused about Australia, ready to move home, yet concerned, hoping that the bonds I have forged here are not in vain. Not sure if I will make it over to this side of the world again. I think I have a lot still to learn from this country and its people, but feel equally about many places. The U.S. is a strange fishbowl and I don't necessarily think we have it right.
To avoid another tangent I will simply say, the next few posts will be recapping my amazing experiences in Indonesia. However, it may be difficult not to continue commenting on the present as this is the lens through which I am reflecting and the existence I am chosing to live in, the now. I am feeling like I have things sorted out more than I had previously to my adventure. That's a definite plus right now :)
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